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Stay Positive About Your Relationship

Come on, tell me what’s wrong with your boyfriend! He doesn’t compliment you enough? He never does the dishes? He doesn’t listen?

I hear so many complaints from girls about the guys they are dating. I have one thing to say to you: Is it bad enough to prompt a break-up? No?

Then quit your complaining and look at the positive! Here are ten tips to help you see the light…

1: Nurture the small stuff. Instead of thinking in a big,
dark, generally negative way about the way things are with you and your partner, think about the little things. Does he make sure you get a coffee in the morning? Does he sometimes bring you home some chocolate or send you a text during the day to let you know he’s thinking of you? Concentrate on these moments – and let the negative stuff slide away. Be a duck.

2: Look at your photos. This is especially good for
long-term relationships. When you are feeling down on your partner, look back over the good times. It’s sure to fill you with warm fuzzies and help you to forget he simply
won’t pick up his wet towel off the floor after his shower.

3: Similarly, read your emails, texts or letters, especially those from the beginning of your relationship (if you are a true romantic you will have kept them!). They will help to remind you what it is you love about your significant other. And whenever you get a new piece of romantic correspondence, don’t forget to keep
it for future melting moments.

4: Whenever you feel happy in your relationship – stop and acknowledge the moment. It’s all too easy to remember only the bad stuff. If you consciously appreciate the good things in life, you will find your mood is more positive in general.

5: Have sex. It’s easy to neglect this aspect of your relationship, but a bit of afternoon nooky will get you feeling all warm and fuzzy again.

6: Weekends away will do wonders for a stale relationship. Float on a ferry over to one of the islands on the Hauraki Gulf or take a road trip to somewhere you have never been before. It doesn’t have to be expensive – bring your own food and make it a romantic night in. Stresses will melt away as soon as you leave the house!

7: Date night! This might seem like a clichéd concept,
but it is easy to forget each other if you always socialise in groups. Organise a date night once a week. Even if you have been together for ages, you still need to put time aside for the two of you. A dinner out, a movie, a picnic, whatever. Most problems come from not communicating – so try to get back in touch.

8: Turn those negatives into positives. When he doesn’t do the dishes, instead of dwelling on it, just lightly suggest you do them together. There is no point in arguing about something as superficial as chores. Keep it light and you will find your partner will be more
responsive to your requests.

9: Exercise together. Running side-by-side or attending a boxing or yoga class together can help you to share the positive energy and endorphins you gain from exercise. Afterwards you will be happy and talkative – and hopefully this feeling will extend into other areas of your relationship.

10: Acknowledge the differences between males and females. We are widely different – there’s no denying it. Try to remember males have completely different upbringings also. Often they are not responsible for as much around the home as their sisters, which then carries over into their grown-up lives. This can be the cause of many an argument when they enter relationships. He just doesn’t see the mess like you do! Read up on the Mars and Venus stuff if you’re interested, or just try to keep in mind that he is basically from another planet. But this doesn’t mean he gets away with it, it just means you can stay chilled when you
tell him its time to pitch in.

Camille

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