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How many weddings have you been to? And how many  more are still to come? I'm guessing the answer is plenty!
Although there is loads written about how to be the perfect bride or groom, there's almost nothing out there on how to be the perfect wedding guest. Isn't that scary? You don't want to be out there ruining someone else's big day because you're an un-educated wedding guest!  Weddings are a fantastic cause for celebration and we nzgirl's do enjoy a good party! If you want to be invited back for housewarmings and baby showers in the future, we suggest you follow a few simple rules and put your best foot forward as the perfect guest! Firstly, when you are invited to a wedding, pick up the phone and say thank you. If you are unable to attend, make sure you send your RSVP as soon as you know, as weddings are a numbers game.
Costs are based per head mostly and your attendance is usually worth approximately $300 (when you take into account invitations, venue hire, reception food and drink, etc). This is exactly why if you can’t make it, you should send your apologies well before the RSVP date. If you will be attending the wedding, get in early with your RSVP on time. Book any travel details so that you don’t cause last minute problems. Notify the bride of any special requirements such as dietary restrictions or needing wheelchair access. If you are invited to bring a partner, let the bride and groom know his name (ideally introduce him to the couple before the big day). This helps cuts out any unnecessary awkwardness - you don't want the bride and groom asking who the random is eating all the cake! Now, on the day – there are a few easy do’s and don’ts:  DO - Arrive to the ceremony on time. It’s the bride’s prerogative to be up to 20 mins late, no one else’s!
- Dress appropriately. The code of dress on the invitation is there for a reason. It goes without saying, don’t upstage the bride!
- Partake in the ceremony graciously. Regardless of your religious or political preferences.
- Introduce yourself! This may seem obvious, but it's important to remember that the bride and groom aren't the only stars of the show. Say hello to whoever's paying for you to be there (usually the parents of the bride and groom) - it will definitely be appreciated!
- Say 'thank you' and 'good bye' before you leave. Another one that may seem super obvious, but can easily be forgotten about!
DON’T  Turn up drunk. This cardinal rule applies to all celebrations. Never, ever turn up drunk.- Get stupidly drunk. Weddings are the time for decent behaviour. Hens and stags nights are the time to get buck wild!
- Act like it’s a high school reunion. It’s a day for family AND friends so be respectful.
- Bitch about where you sit. It probably took the couple ages to put the seating plan together. It’s only for a few hours of your life, so no matter how crappy your seat is, grin and bear it sunshine!
- Talk through the speeches. No matter how tedious, long or boring they are, there is nothing worse than a rude, loud mouth talking through the speeches!
- Leave straight after dessert. Traditionally the bride and groom should be the first to leave, however this is not always the case. Show a bit of respect by staying to help celebrate and make the night a fun one.
When it comes to presents...You may wish to give the couple a gift even if you aren’t going to the wedding. If you are attending the wedding the options normally are: buying off a gift registry, giving to a wishing well or honeymoon registry (so the couple can afford that trip to the Maldives) or donating to a charity that the couple have nominated (a very eco-sensitive move these days). The rule of thumb for spending on a couple, is for it to be the same amount as a nice dinner for two including wine (so about $120- $150). For more fabulous, but affordable ideas click here Lastly, after it’s all over and your Jimmy Choo’s are put away till the next soiree, don’t forget to write your thank-you letter. Although traditionally sent to the great people who forked out for the wedding (such as the parents) you may wish to send one to the couple, as well as both sets of parents. If you just can’t extend yourself to writing a card or note (emails are OUT) than at least pick up the phone. Remember, it's all about good manners!  If you've got a wedding coming up or know a bride in need of a little help to get her big day underway, we have the perfect prize! We've got five copies of Marziplanner, Australia and New Zealand's number one wedding planning software (RRP $99.95) to give away. It's an easy-to-use program which helps organise every aspect of a wedding - from the guest list to the seating plan. It's the modern girls lifesaver! To test out a free 7-day trial visit www.marziplanner.com  To go in the draw to win one of five copies of Marziplanner just name your favourite article in our wedding section! You can find some ideas below... Ilka Brookes
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