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Until approaching the milestone that is the age of 30, you hear plenty of people talking about it as the definition of getting old.
However, as our thirtieth birthday looms closer, our opinions may change. Most 30-somethings will agree that in this decade of your life, you know your mind and yourself well enough to gain the confidence you lacked in your twenties – so it could be the best time to be independent. I spoke to two thirty-something women – and one who is close to her thirtieth birthday – about being thirty, being single, and why they’re cool with it! Cathy, 29, Accounts Executive, Auckland. What is your living situation? I live with flatmates in Ponsonby. I used to live with my ex in an apartment in town, but we split up about two years ago and I have lived in my huge room with bay windows ever since! I love it, because I can decorate how I like. I also love taking up the whole bed all weekend long! Do you worry about your 30th birthday coming up? Sort of. It is definitely a big birthday and I know it means I should probably have things sorted out by now – like maybe my love life. I do have enough savings for a deposit on a house though, so this year I plan to buy a place. I feel like that makes me seem a bit more organised! Is being single a concern? It is, because so many of my friends are shacked up. About half are married and around a third have kids. I sometimes feel like they look down on me a bit because they think I’m still living the student life – but it’s not really like that. I live with young professionals and we have a good time; we’re all mature and get along really well. Jennifer, 32, Teacher, Thames What is your living situation? I live alone in a house I own. I saved up and managed to purchase it when I was 28, so I feel pretty proud of that. It’s fun having your own house and being able to do what you like with it. What is it like being in your 30s? How does it compare to your 20s? When I think of my 20s, I remember being unsure about a lot of things. I remember doing a lot of needless worrying about where my life was heading – stuff like that. I really think you just need to relax and enjoy your 20s, and you’ll see that everything falls into place eventually. How about being single? Do you feel pressure from your friends and family? I definitely get pressure from my mum to find a man and settle down, but I actually do pretty well for myself. I have been in a lot of relationships but, strange as it may sound, I am comfortable in my own company at the moment. I don’t really want a boyfriend, although I do go on a lot of dates. I guess I would like to have someone by 35 though – that seems like a good age to start a family. What about children? Yes I would like to have kids. I am not too worried though – I have plenty of nieces and nephews! Theresa, 33, Personal Trainer in Manukau What is your living situation? I live with my six-year-old son in a house I bought last year. His dad lived with us up until November, but we broke up, so I am newly single and loving it! What do you think about being single in your 30s? Is there any stigma attached to it? A little bit, but a lot of my friends who got together with people while they were in their 20s are now going through break-ups.
I sometimes wonder if you should stay single through your 20s to get to know yourself better, then concentrate on dating in your 30s. For now I am just enjoying being by myself though, so I guess I did it the other way around. What do you enjoy about being in your 30s? I have a lot of energy because I do a lot of exercise, but I also have my wits about me – I don’t go out and get drunk heaps like I did when I was younger. I don’t worry so much as I did about things like what guys think of me. I dress how I want to dress and I live how I want to live. My son and I have a great time, taking off on the weekends to the beach. I’m teaching him to surf. He is the only man in my life right now, but I wouldn’t have it any other way! Camille
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